I'm an honest sinner.

I've been thinking a lot lately, which usually is dangerous because I tend to over think! Anyways, what I've been thinking about are some simple truths. 1) We all sin. 2) Why are there so many judgmental people? and 3) Since when is it ok for the church to live in such hypocrisy. These are all factors that have been weighing on my mind. As I was scrolling through my Pinterest page, I once again found a little saying that absolutely struck me. Written on a white poster in red, block font, the saying went like this "In life, I rather be known as an honest sinner, than a lying hypocrite." To be honest, I immediately took a semi-defensive stand and muttered under my breath "oh, how stupid is that." I read it again, but this time, my attitude was different. How true is this little sentence, I thought to myself! Honest sinner vs. Lying hypocrite...there's a big fight between those two. Looking back, I let the lying hypocrite win in my life for a long time. Instead of sympathizing, admitting, and learning from my sins, I would act as though I hadn't committed any. In all reality, I was a "goody-goody" who tirelessly tried to maintain an image of perfection. In my reflection upon my prior mentality in all this, I realized that I missed a lot of opportunities to connect with peers, both in and out of the church. Instead of sharing my own struggle with various sins, and thus creating a trusting bond, I chose to display a "do no wrong" attitude and act as though I was a step higher. Now, this was not intentional by any means. In my head, being that perfect Christian was the way to show the church. This was my first mistake. We are called to show God's love and mercy, not the perfection, wealth, or goodness of our given church. I love my church no doubt, and there's HUGE value in being part of it, but what has even more value is my relationship with Christ. What do I say over and over again? It's a relationship, NOT a religion. It's us coming to the Lord, confessing our sins, giving our lives to him, and letting his great works do his will in us. On the same note as the goody two shoes act, I had a tendency to judge. Now, this is human nature, and I don't care who you are, you've done it. As I was trying to show perfection in the church and my own actions, I inadvertently looked down on those who were stumbling (in the exact same ways I refused to admit myself, I might add.) Let's say a friend went to a party Saturday night, got drunk, then showed up to church the next morning. My mentality, in addition to many of those in the church, was to think who does she think she is, walking in here after a night like that, acting all good? Ok, so maybe she seemed to portray an attitude of she's totally fine, and hadn't had a rough night....but what if on the inside she was hurting, longing, and looking for the outstretched arm of another believer who could understand the mistakes she made. Not someone to judge her, someone to tell her all the wrong she had done, but rather someone who could share the message of God's love, mercy, and grace to her. This is where we have to let the honest sinner role win. Taking a moment to step down from our all high and mighty, power Christian role, and just sympathize and share the message of hope is the best bet. We have no room to judge. That IS a fact. Just because someone sins in a different way than you, doesn't make you any better, or them any worse. This is something that I've struggled with. In high school, I could say well she acts like a whore, and I don't so, obviously I'm a step ahead. In reality, however, my judgmental actions are a sin in their own right. In God's eyes, a sin is a sin. He's there to forgive us. I mean, after all, he sent his son to die on a cross for us! Proverbs 28:13 says 'People who conceal their sins will not prosper, but if they confess and turn from them, they will receive mercy.' That pretty much sums up what I'm getting at. Hiding our faults and portraying perfection gets us no where. Confessing our sins, learning from them, and then changing our ways will as a result, change our lives. Everyday I struggle with sin. From decisions I make to the words I speak, it's a battle. The fact of the matter is that I will fall short sometimes, but that is where God's mercy comes in. Perfection is something we can not achieve, for reals y'all. Romans 3:23 states that everyone has sinned and fallen short of the glory. Hiding behind a facade of the 'ideal' Christian is a lost cause. Living in the right ways, doing the best you can, loving the Lord above all else, and sharing the Gospel however, is a great idea. I rather have people know every mistake I've made and see God's love and mercy through those experiences, rather than acting like I don't make those mistakes and putting myself above others, like I'm so much better. Merriam Webster defines a hypocrite as a person who puts on a false appearance of virtue of religion; a person who acts in contradiction to his or her beliefs. This certainly doesn't sound like someone I want to be, someone I want to know, or someone who can reach out to those who have yet to come to Christ. I'll admit it, I struggle with practicing what I preach on the daily. It's easy to say "hey, don't use cuss words, it's sin," yet turn around and yell d***i* when I spill a pan of horse feed. It's easy to say drinking in excess is wrong, yet justify it when you're at a party. Everyday I wake up, thank the Lord for all I have been blessed with, and carry on with normal activities. Everyday I work at one area of sin I've been struggling with. Everyday I fail in another aspect of sin as well. This world we live in is a fallen one, desperate for God's love to be spread. Acting better than the tweakers who are battling terrible addictions, or more holy than those who are in broken families struggling to get by, will get us no where, friends. Sunday morning game faces, portraying we all have the perfect little lives only breed resentment. People outside the church see these ridiculous acts as well...ridiculous. Hypocrisy isn't welcoming anyone inside the doors of the morning service, but genuine love and the desire to reach out is. Brothers and sisters, we are loved more than we'll ever know, by someone who died to know us....(this stemming from Romans 5:8: But God demonstrates his own love for us in this, while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.) If Christ died for US, while we were lowly sinners, then why can't WE show love to those who are dealing with the same sins? The answer is we can. The sound being an honest sinner sounds a bit extreme, but hey, that's who I am. I have sinned, I have been forgiven. There is no condemnation! The real you is the best you. God made you, he loves you, and has a plan for everything that happens in your life. Let his overflowing mercy change you, then go out and share it, then let it change someone else's life. I'm an honest sinner, and I praise the Lord for that.